When it comes to making deposits in my relationships, I now take more time in getting to know that individual in order to relate and get a sense of what values I should place in that relationship. In a study done by Saeku Fukushima, a way to obtain a better understanding of a person is through, "politeness can be construed in relation to the heart; and that behavioral (non-linguistic) politeness, an understudied area in the field, should be taken into account." In other words my efforts to get to know a person can be done through kindness.
The Image I Leave
explains who you are, what you stood for and the impact you have had on others.
How have I impacted others
In my relationship with my husband, we've always had great communication but I realized that it can can better and stronger. When it comes to emotions, his and mine, I am now able to bind them together as well as dissect his and my emotions. In a study done by Nasir Farheen, emotions are analyzed, "First Intrapersonal domain deals with knowing and managing oneself. It includes various aspects like emotional self-awareness; the degree to which one is aware about his own feelings, assertiveness; to express one's feelings and thoughts while standing and defending one's position, independence; to be self- directed and self-controlled and to stand on one's own two feet, self-regard; to recognize one's strengths and weakness and to accept them and self- actualization; involvement in meaningful pursuits that allow to realize one about his potentials.6 Second Interpersonal domain is an ability to interact and get along with others. It includes empathy; to tune in to and emotionally read others, social responsibility; to function as a dependable and trustworthy member of a team or community and interpersonal relationships; to maintain a mutually beneficial relationship marked by give and take and a sense of emotional closeness." To me this just proves how paying attention to emotions is vital, not only in our personal relationships but also ourselves.
Emotions
Understanding the Individual
What I stood for
When it comes to my relationships I like to stand for integrity. The Seven Habits of Highly Effective people puts it in this perspective, " if we can't make and keep commitments to ourselves as well as to others, our commitments become meaningless" (loc 3824). I translate to mean that if I don't do what is right or prioritize what is important to someone I care for then they will also see through the lack of acts and interests that it is meaningless. I don't like to make people feel let down cause I know how that feels.
When it comes to my integrity, I practice the Golden Rule, ( treat everyone the way you like to be treated). The Interplay text book explains the Supir-Whorf hypothesis, applying linguistic relativity, to different languages such as the Hopi. Their world view is one big picture because there is no distinction between verbs and nouns as opposed to how native English speakers view the world as snapshots, due to connecting nouns to either be "fixed or constant" (p.144). My hispanic background has given my a different sense of the world. It is also changing due to better understanding of my native tongue, Spanish as well as being a new mother, I would like my son to have a similar outlook while also developing his own perspective.
Integrity
I am a more understanding person
Listening
According to a research conducted by Kuhn, Rebekka, et al., "attentive listening during disclosure of stress covaries in expected ways with support provision and judgments of relationship quality" I found this to be true in all of my relationships. When I actually take the time to just listen, not adding my personal autobiography, the communication and understanding of the relationship (between my husband and I) has become much stronger.
